Tuesday, April 12, 2016

A Humble Encourager

"Going from 2 to the 3 was the absolute hardest," say so many mamas to the mama pregnant with her third baby with a plastered smile on her face. And it makes sense - you go from man-to-man defense to zone-defense. You run out of hands that can grab on to kids. The parents are officially outnumbered. I get it. It's a fair warning. I don't mind people telling me this because I think it's probably true.

I don't think people purposely say it to instill fear or anxiety but sometimes I think people (myself included) can get so hung up on the hard, worn-out and exhausting parts that we forget to glorify the good stuff and give credit to God. Last week I was reading Titus. It is a tiny book squished in the middle of the New Testament. Chapter 2 is about teaching and it breaks it down into groups: older and younger men, and older and younger women. Verses 2:7-8 says:

"In your teaching show integrity, seriousness, and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us."

In other words: watch your mouth. Be nice. Be encouraging. The devotional attached to this went on to say this:

How special is that? God gives us each other for a reason. He gives us older moms and younger moms. He gives us active moms and crafty moms. He gives us women who have children and women who don't. He gives us working moms and SAHMoms. He gives us married and single moms/women. He gives us each other so we can teach one another and learn. So we can observe and apply. So we can love and encourage.

Just when I was feeling like most moms only had the hard stuff to say about going from 2 to 3 kids, God gave me several moms that lifted me up. Some more seasoned than me, others pretty much in line with my journey in motherhood.

A mother with four, said 2 to 3 isn't that bad but it's an adjustment just like any other baby because it's a new person. You will do great.

She also said, your kids now wipe their bums and understand directions. When you went from 1 to 2, you basically had to babies. Don't worry.

Another, much more seasoned mama, said it will be hard in waves. Like your mornings getting Isaiah off to school will feel hectic but then you will get your groove going for the day. You will be fine.

Years ago, when my sister went form 2 to 3 (ages 0, 1, & 3) and I was still struggling with going from 0 to 1, I stared at her through my zombie eyes and asked how she did it? She told me, I don't know, you just get better. Your kids get older and you get better so it works.

I'm so thankful for my encouragers. Do I think it's okay to vent and be honest and real? Absolutely. But let's not forget to top our venting off with encouragement. With love. With humility. With hope. With support. We're a village of mamas. God gave us each other for a reason.

 Also, I am 24 weeks (plus a few days) now and errrybody knows I'm pregnant. So strangers keep asking me for help. It makes me laugh. I'm so pregnant right now.


  1. I heard the same thing and was pretty nervous. I have to say though that it wasn't harder like they said. I am more seasoned and relaxed. I think the beginning stages of being a mom is hard nit because they are hard but because we are still learning. Always learning. Your a natural, it will bring such a fullness. That's my favorite about lots of kids. It's a blast