Sunday, July 11, 2010

Am I pregnant or stupid?

I've read stories about people getting the "pregnant stupids" and while I think they're hysterical, I think I've got them...bad. All the time. Every day. My guess is that because I lucked out with morning sickness (or lack of), God decided to turn me into an idiot.

Case in point. Thursday afternoon, I drove all the way home from work (about 20 minutes) only to realize I forgot my work keys, which I needed to open the office the next morning. So I had to rush back to work before my co-worker left at 5 p.m. to grab them. She looked at me like I was crazy. I told her I was.

Then when I got home, Darren and I were going to meet my aunt and uncle and cousins downtown for dinner. So we rushed off to dinner and as soon as we hit the busy grid of downtown, I realized, I FORGOT MY PHONE.

This would be OK any other day except for the fact that 1) I was the only one that had any of their phone numbers and 2) We didn't even designate a spot to meet - we were just going to call them when we got there. So, of course, I start freaking out asking Darren, "What are we going to do? We have to turn around to get my phone!" He ever so calmly said, "Why don't you just call your dad from my phone to get your uncle's number?"

Duh. That's why I love him.

The Biggest Stupid Event happened this morning. It all started last night when I was balancing my check book like a responsible adult and I left my wallet on the desk. I even saw it this morning and said to myself, "I can't forget to put that in my purse before I leave."

Well, I did forget but I didn't realize it until I had put all the grocery items I needed in my basket, got in line, put everything on the counter, then opened my purse to find the most important item of my trip missing.

So I shamefully, put everything back into my basket, thanked the kind man behind me for letting me go ahead of him but that "I left my wallet in the car." He said he would wait for me to run out and get it. Since when are Californians so nice?!?! So I told him I parked across the parking lot and didn't want to make him wait. Little did he know that "across the parking lot" also meant down the street, in my living room, and on my desk.

So I went through the aisles and returned all my items to their proper place (because I'm that nice), hopped in my car, drove home, grabbed my wallet, then decided to go to a different grocery store because, well, I embarrassed myself.

Darren is also learning to not interrupt me when I'm talking. Ever. It's not because I get mad, it's because I forget what in the heck I was saying!

I think at my next doctor's appointment I'll ask if there's a way to reverse these stupid spells. I'm too tired to keep forgetting all this stuff! In the meantime, I guess I'll glue my keys and my wallet to my belly since that's the only thing I pay attention to these days!

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